At home with 2

I had a realization yesterday that I never thought I would have. 

We were at a friends house having a play date. This friend has a couple older kids in school, then one daughter Sariahs age. She mentioned that she will occasionally fall asleep wth her daughter at nap time. 

It caught me off guard in a wired way.

Sort of like déjàvu.

I used to fall asleep with Sariah during nap time all the time. 

But now it is a rare occurrence. First I have to find the time to be home during nap time. Then make sure both kids sleep at the same time. Then I have the never-ending chore list tugging me away. 

I should have been jealous. Knowing me, that is what my reaction would most like have been. And even a month ago It would have been. 

When Séamus was first born, I remember missing having only one child. Almost wishing for the days of single child freedom. But I knew I didn't want to give up Sariah or Séamus. I knew that I would die without Sariah, and moments after Séamus was born I knew I would fight to keep him. There was no way I would give up one of them to only have one child again . The only option was to love them both; but even more importantly- LOVE HAVING TWO CHILDREN. 

And that is what I realized yesterday. When my friend mentioned that she could take naps, I thought "what would I do without Séamus? Who would keep me entertained while Sariah slept?"

I thought it before I even realized I was thinking it. And like that, I was grateful for two kids. Grateful for the never ending chaos. Grateful that every day they grow, they will have each other. Grateful that I always have something to do, and someone to love. 

Even if it means never sleeping again.

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Be Mine

I never know how to feel about Valentines Day. This year, I think I have my feelings figured out.

Growing up, Valentines day is like another Halloween. You get to give out valentines (some more awkward than others, because you have to give one to everyone in your class), you get to make crafts and eat lots of sweets and candy. It was just a good day.
Then, when these days of valentine requirements is gone, and the idea of actually 'competing' (like the Hunger Games, but for men instead of your life), comes up, Valentines sort of lost its appeal. The Hallmark-ness seemed to hit in, and even now- it often seems like Valentines day is a day for women to be pampered by their men, and show the world how much their husbands can do for them.

We all know the story of St. Valentines.
Okay, maybe we don't. But we have some sort of idea, or have heard rumors.
It didn't end pretty, that is where I will end that one.

So what I don't get, is why does Valentines day have to be isolated to the person we are romantic with? I mean, all year long- I tell Joe I love him, and I think it means even more to him (I know i do) when he does romantic gestures that are NOT on intended romantic holidays. We have our anniversary. And then we have 364 (sometimes 365) other days of the year to rave about how much we appreciate and care for each other.

So, really, shouldn't valentines day be about LOVE? Not for those who we may share a bed or home with- but those who impact our lives for the better? Our capacity to love should not be limited to the ring on our finger. It should be only limited to how big our heart is.

I love Joseph.
And I really do like Valentines day, because why should anyone hate a day that is meant to show our love for each other?
I love Sariah, and my family, our furry animals, and all my friends and those wonderful teachers who have helped me, encouraged me and taught me along the way.

So, to you all,  HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!

I can't help but to laugh at this as I scroll threw my Facebook feed. =]

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I didn't fail, I just wasn't successful.

Tonight Temple Grandin spoke at UNL.
We were pretty excited, and had been planning on attending for a few weeks- well before Christmas.
We even got there 30 minutes early, had a bag full of treats and toys for Sariah, had her in her pj's, and we even had dinner before we left- not rushing. Oh ya, we were PRE-PARED.

Except for the fact that UNL is an Ag-based school, and so we were not quite ready for the crowd of people that were there. Or the fact that there were no open seats by the time we got there. I mean, they had overflow seats. But then we found out that they were broadcasting it online. And heck, if we are gonna watch her speak on a TV anyways, we would much rather do it from the comfort of our toddler-friendly home.

BUT I was able to go all paparazzi and grab some horrible iphone pictures of her.
We even probably breathed the same air as her. Cool, huh?

By the way, this is Temple Grandin.

 

 

via

She is an amazing women. In a nutshell: She was the first women animal behaviorist, revolutionized the meat industry as we know it, and has a PhD in animal science. By the way, she was diagnosed with brain damage and is considered autistic, although has accomplished HUGE milestones in her life and is a big autistic activist.

HBO did a great movie about her. Beyond this, she has personally been published many times- and is part of the BIG reason why I am A-OK eating a nice big steak for dinner tonight. At least that cow died happy, thanks to her.

via

Anyways, it isn't always about the fact that you didn't succeed.
It's more about the idea that you get to try again.

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Let's face the resolutions.

I have never really made a New Years resolution. Not that I can recall, and if I did- I never wrote it down. So I thought, this year, since all the blogging world is doing it- and life is changing and I am trying to better myself, that maybe, just maybe, it would help me to actually think about it, write it down- and actually work on some goals. Hmmm? Sounds like a plan, huh? Well, we shall see.


1. Teach Scout to track

I gotta admit, I feel like this one is a bit of a cop-out, because I know it is gonna be more Joe's field, but it will have to be a family activity. Since we have Scout, we always toyed with the idea that instead of hunting with her, we would like to train her to to search and rescue. And so we have since she was little, trained her to track a bit. Living in Nebraska, with no mountains or beach around- we feel a bit lost and aren't sure what to commit to doing for our hobby. So, we have committed that since we have Scout- and we believe FIRMLY that dog's should have purposes- that we want to get her to track (and eventually search and rescue). This year, we want to get her all certified to be VST tracking certified.




2. Read more
I have weeks where I will read a few books really fast and be all hardcore about it, but I often lose it the moment I pick up a bad book. And that is what I want my main goal to be- to not be deterred by a bad book. I want to pick up any book, and be able to read it in a normal length of time, whether it is fiction, sci-fi, biography, romance, etc.

Any good recommendations?

3. Disconnect myself with Facebook
I really don't like that place, but I know that I am not capable of letting go. Not yet, at least. So I want to monitor myself. And I expect that the less I go on, the happier I will be. Yes, I expect it- I expect it would happen to most people. I want to start with trying to only check Facebook once a day (I know that sounds sad, I am just one of those people that just robotically checks it when I am waiting in the car/bored).

4. Feel better about myself
I have no idea how to do this. I have seen random pins on Pinterest about this- and quotes everywhere, but they all seem vague/fake/common. I want to LOVE my body, the way I look and feel. I don't have to be model-esq, or beauty queen. I just want to know that when Sariah grows up, and reaches that troublesome age when she hates her body, that I can look at her, loving my OWN body and self, and tell her she will do- and how to do it. If I can't respect myself or my own body- how will she respect me, or herself?


5. Voice myself more
In everything. At church I want to share my thoughts. I want to share myself with my journal more. I want to be more open and honest here on my blog. I want to share my views on things with my family. I want to find my voice and be true to it. 

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Let's take a look: 2012

2012 was an interesting year. I have to admit, looking back- I am much more excited for what 2013 will bring than what 2012 brought. It wasn't a horrible year- I mean, some pretty great things happened.  But we went through some pretty big trials. It is nice looking back now though, and seeing how much we went through and how hard it was at the time- and how much more knowledge I have now. I am grateful for the things 2012 taught us, and what it brought- but I ever look forward to 2013!

JANUARY






































-My sister came home from serving her mission for our church in Arizona.
-While we were home for Christmas, my family & Joe's were able to meet Sariah (mostly, my dad, sisters and brother, and Joe's brother).
-Sariah went to the beach for her first time.
-I started my LAST semester of my BA degree.

 


FEBRUARY

Sorry. Horrible phone picture.

-Penny turned 12 (That old geezer)
-Scout was born! (Little did we know at the time)
-I turned 22!
-Enjoyed being in the mountains of Idaho with our Yukon and friends.
-Get a Bike trailer

Yes. The look on her face is, "Get away or I will eat you".

My birthday present- we were excited to start biking as a family!

MARCH

- One year since Napoleon left us.

- Celebrated Alamo Days

-And St. Patricks Day

-More time outside in the mountains.

-Start worrying about our future plans when we graduate.

-GIRL SCOUT COOKIE TIME ahhh joy. =]

She has changed SO much!!

Alamo days are from Feb 23-March 6th.

APRIL

-I GRADUATE!!!

- We get Scout

- We move and leave Rexburg and move home to Ca while we work out our plans.

- Celebrate our 2 year anniversary.

-Joe starts his last semester of his BS.

Saying goodbye to so many good friends. And yes, Sariah loves Christmas, don't mock her pajamas

Little itty bitty Scout.

Reunited with the beach at last!

MAY

Always hanging out near each other.

-Sucked. Kinda

-We struggled to figure out what to do, so Joe applied to job after job, and Grad school.

-Sariah and Scout become BFF's.

- We learned to appreciate being home and the beautiful things only California has.

-Celebrate my FIRST official mothers day.

-Joe gets various job offers, and starts working for the State.

View of any typical day.

Happy Mothers day to me!

JUNE

Don't you LOVE the farm cake I made him? With my moms help too. =]

-Joe turns 27!

- Start looking seriously into Grad school.

- We have lots of BBQ's, bonfires and hikes.

-Head to the Drive-inns with Sariah, and she goes on a swing! Lots of firsts.

Learning to eat, all by herself.

JULY

- We celebrate 4th of July with lots of family.

-Visit our friends from Idaho who moved to central California.

- Joe get's accepted to University of Nebraska- Lincoln for his Masters degree!

- Still spend time at the beach, lots of walks, BBQ's and fires.

- Pack up, leave California and move to Nebraska!

-Joe finishes his BS and graduates. =]

The journey to Grad school was long and frustrating. But, we made it!

The ride out here. Longest ride ever- NEVER again.

Exploring our new home. =]

AUGUST

The pretty birthday girl!

- We live in Nebraska for a month until school starts school, getting to know the city.

-Sariah turns ONE!

- Joe starts school!

-We survive the heat. Barely.

His advisors. It is just so official.

The heat is exhausting.

We seem to be surrounded by train tracks.

SEPTEMBER 

-We enjoy lots of trips to the park

-Explore more of Lincoln, and already feel acquainted with the city.

-Check out the zoo.

OCTOBER

- Sariah learns how amazing Corn boxes are.

-Sariah learns how amazing massaging heat pads are.

-Go on lots of walks

-Celebrate Halloween

Halloween

Lots of walks with lots of leaves.

NOVEMBER

- Family photos

-Soup month (Made soup for dinner ALL month long).

-Worked hard to reduce our driving (well done, too).

-Celebrate Thanksgiving with family in Iowa.

-Walk everywhere.

DECEMBER

- Baked lots.

- Celebrated Christmas, first time just us!.

-Finally had snow in Lincoln.

- Celebrated New Years with a bang.

-Learn to cope with trials and struggles and try to be happy no matter what.

It has been quite the year. With so many firsts with Sariah like crawling, walking and eating real food.

Joe and I have changed so much, and been through a lot. 

Thanks 2012 for teaching us a lot of good stuff. 

The End.

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Things you wish you knew...

Since the world as we know it will be ending in about, 50 hours or so... (And yes, I know that The Mayan Apocolypse is over. I also know that when I say 'world' I really mean the US of A), and because ALL you ever see on the news is BAD news, I thought I would share some things you WISH YOU HAD KNOWN. You know, before the world dies and we have to start fighting over milk, taxes, and whatever else you can think of. 



1. 365 Superheroes

here

This man set a goal to draw 365 superheroes in one year. A new superhero every day.
Well, it's year 3 and he isn't quite done yet, but still. It's almost New Years. Isn't it important that no matter what happens, we decide to finish our goals? Because it isn't about setting them- but about finishing them.
And what about someone as amazing and creative to create this many superheroes? Even Disney can't claim that!

here

2. The Ultimate Jump

Did you hear about the man who jumped from SPACE?

Yes. Space. And not like out of a space ship onto the moon kinda jump.

We are talking he went up in a pressurized capsule, reached the stratosphere (about 24 miles away) and then got out in a space suite, and JUMPED out. Plummeted to earth. And landed in New Mexico.

here

Can you just imagine how hard it would be to be up there and be like, "Great. What did I do now? Well, It's either I jump, or I fall with this heap of metal." And then to will yourself outta that thing? 

Yes, he had a parachute. 

And yes, it is awesome. 

But of course, not one of Barbara Walters top ten, nor googles. Sad. 

3. Ronald Brown

Haven't heard of him either? Color me purple.

Ronald Brown died in mid-October at the good age of 94. He was a Britain who had served in WWII, who had stepped on a land mine in 1944 while serving in France.

After he was cremated, they found 6 oz. of shrapnel in his leg. 

6 oz!!

I don't know about you all, but I walk like I am severely crippled if I have a sliver of glass in my foot.

6 oz is a LOT. 

He would tell his kids and grandkids that he had been hit by a bullet- but NEVER alluded to how much. He would tell them they could not sit on his bad leg, but NEVER alluded to how much pain he was in. No one in the family ever knew. And this man lived a LONG life, and he WORKED. And lived with that shrapnel in his leg for 72 years! 

That is a man for you. 

here

Just some things I thought you all should know.

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Just gotta make it through the day.

Somedays, you just know. You know before you put your feet on the ground. You know before you roll over to look at the clock. You know before anyone has to say, "Time to get up!". It's just gonna be that kinda day.

Today was one of those days.

Sariah decided to wake up before 5 am. That is never a good sign of how a day will turn out.
And all afternoon long, Sariah just wasn't okay being ignored. She had to be held and entertained all day long. She really does require a lot of work and attention, darn thing. Why doesn't anyone tell you that BEFORE you get pregnant? Huh? (Just kidding. I love her more than ever and was well aware. But still....I didn't know the extent). 

So all day, you battle with this child to keep her happy
- and to keep her recent screeching habit at bay
- and to keep her out of the fridge where the fudge is hiding- and to make sure she stops putting things in the toilet
- and try to stop her from grabbing/carrying around pencils where she eats the erasers, and pens, and crayons to mark the wall with
-and make sure she leaves dad alone long enough to try and write his smarty-pants thesis
-AND you are just waiting for dinner. Because then bath time comes. Then bed time. But bed times takes forever. Because Sariah doesn't want to go to sleep a la carte (aka, no nursing- but we are working on this). 

Then finally, she is asleep. And you CHERISH that moment.
She is asleep in your arms, so peaceful, and adorable, and you just want to kiss her to wake her up and see those bright pretty eyes again. But you lay  her peacefully in her crib and watch her curl up, and you tiptoe out of her room and begin your own nighttime routine.

Then your husband gets some fudge out of the fridge, and comments about the red pen laying in the fridge.
And that, is what gets you through the whole day. Even though you didn't know about it when you woke up- your whole day revolved around that one moment, opening the fridge, and realizing that no matter where your daughter goes or what she is doing- she will ALWAYS impact your life. And hopefully, it always makes you smile. =]

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Catch That!

Have you guys seen/heard/watched the NRA's words about the shooting from Connecticut?

I know it is getting lots of press. Good and bad.

Good from those who want to keep guns, 

and bad from those who are a bit more liberal and want to get rid of them.

With statements like, 

"NRA wants Armed Police in US schools"

It can come off a little intrusive and worrisome.

But I agree with it.

The argument he is making here, is that we have bodyguards for so many things.

The President.

Banks.

Airports.

Sport Games.

But not schools? Not for our children who we cherish so much? Doesn't it seem like our priorities are a little skewed?

That is what he thought.

I am sure we all have our personal views on gun ownership.

I know it is all I have been hearing about from my husband for the past, well, week. 

I believe in the Constitution. 

I believe in protecting my family. 

And it is stupid that people in this country ruin that.

It is horrible that they can't get help. 

That social issues turn into gun issues.

That now, I have to start thinking about private schools, instead of public schools.

I love this girl. Oh so much.

I hate that someone could want to hurt her.

That I can't just worry about her not stubbing a toe, burning her finger or breaking a bone, but so much more.

I hate that I have to worry about how I am going to protect her from it.

Mostly, I hate that she has to grow up in this sort of world.

What do we do in this age of living?

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